The Darkness of Our Sexual Society

dripdripdropped:

Kelly & I have been going out for super cheap dim sum for the last couple months, and we’ve started to become a bit chummy with the staff there, though there are some language barriers.

So, a couple months back Kelly went to pay and one of the male servers asked her if she was “going to the parade”. She was confused for a moment til she realized he meant the pride parade. Kelly is kind of a 100-footer, if you know what I mean. She said yes, they had a little laugh and we parted ways thinking it was kind of a bizarre exchange.

Next time we went, just after we’d sat down, the same server came over to clean off the table next to us, and I chuckled remembering his conversation with Kelly. I guess he’d overheard and started giggling and then all three of us were all giggling together.

This morning we went back ($1.80/dish before 11 am!?! It’s absurd!) and I’d thrown on my favourite dress before coming. As I followed the server to pay at the register, he points down and says “So woman today! So woman today!” and I laughed nervously. When we got to the cash he pointed in Kelly’s direction and says “Is she your lover?” I kind of stammered for a second before blurting out “oh uh mm, she’s my partner?”. Then he pulls out a fist and yells “WE’RE HERE, WE’RE QUEER, DON’T FOCK WITH US!!” I was STUNNED. IT WAS AMAZING. We exchanged a few words about how he’s also queer, and how he lives near the village.

I couldn’t stop laughing about it after we’d left! We’d just been wondering over lunch if maybe he was also queer. So great.

blt6413:

Girls: I can be hooked on for months

Guys: I only stay interested for a week.

Girls: I have alot of physical attraction to.

Guys: I think some are cute or hot, but sexual attraction is too a minimum.

Girls: Sex is amazing.

Guys: Sex is faking it and painful

Girls: I can love

Guys: I can try to pretend

Girls: I have a friendship too

Guys: I am awkward with

Girls: Kissing is amazing

Guys: It’s different

Girls: Understand

Guys: Ass Holes

Girls: I could spend time alone with for hours

Guys: Time alone is kind of awkward.

a-ofcaesura:

_{they counted up to two—
many times, it was just them
together, in the dark room.} 

_{it was hardly making love,
           one said.
well, it certainly wasn’t heartless fucking,
           laughed the other.}

_{one took pictures with his eyes
saving up memories like pennies
like he planned to buy happiness in a goddamn box
one day.}

_{the other hated that stupid camera.
it watched him when he wanted no eyes to see him
and preserved something not worth
preserving.} 

_{i’ve never had such a friend as you, laughed one.
we’re not friends, stated the other and straightened his shirt.
           friends never do this.
then what are we?
nothing at all.
ouch.}

_{and when he looked back on it,
when he browsed those photographs that his wife never saw,
though he knew they were his best ones
           —art, raw thoughtless art—
he wonder how it started.
he wondered why he never said it.}

                   i love you, too.

_{it had not been precious
           but it had been intimate
one had tried to give everything
           the other rejected him}

_{but those gentle hands had put down that camera
and those carefree eyes had closed.}

_{the other had survived.
the one had not.}

_{photographs burned much easier than quiet regrets, he realized,
looking into the flames where they smoldered in crackling silence.}

———-
Old poem.
Photo does NOT belong to me, but it was the inspiration.

(Source: corpcreations)

thomascr:

I was in line at Subway in the cafeteria at school today. This cute guy was in front of me, holding a Pippin book, so I imagine he was a musical theatre student. He kept looking at me, then he would turn away, then I would look at him. Our eyes met a few times and we smiled at each other.

It made me nervous, gave me butterflies, whatever you want to call it. I haven’t felt that way in a long time.

(Source: tomcablerees)

whatsagayboytodo:

Every time I think about him…and that’s alot.

I just liked him so much.  Maybe I just expected too much out of the situation.  It’s just for once I thought I maybe had a chance with someone.  Is that too much to want?  This situation fucking sucks.

I miss him so much.  I miss hanging out all the time like we would.  Why did I have to go and catch feelings?  Just because a boy (who may or may not be gay) likes hanging out with me does not mean he is interested.  I need to remember that. And for some reason I still feel like there was something there.

I should just accept the fact that I’m gonna be alone forever.

I just feel like weeping away forever.